Lately I've been feeling rather excited about this topic and writing about it... I have many people in my life who seem constantly impressed with how much I do. While I'm all about the flattery and basking in the love, and I do get a lot done of a huge variety, I'm always pushed to justify my attitude around it all.
I definitely have off-days. I have days where I already need to push the reset button at 9am. There are days when Wilder and I snap at each other (it generally goes both ways) and we need some reset snuggle time. Some days Sunny wants to be held or worn all day and those days always pan out in a different ways.
I think what I've actually gotten really great at is not caring whether or not I can "get it all done". What I mean is, I care a great deal, but I'm not hard on myself either way. Sure I have huge to-do lists, I have a semi-big house to keep clean (yeah, right), I run 2 businesses, I sing and play in a band that practices weekly and gigs several times a month, I keep up with my social media accounts, I make random attempts at getting involved in community projects, I make herbal products for our product line using plants from the land here, I have a crawling nursing on demand baby and an amazingly active 5 year old, and a hubby who I love love love to hang out with. There's a lot going on in my day to day life.
I don't go to bed with a clean house every night and I don't clean up after my 5 year old's constant art projects - instead we've created a few "stations" that he likes to keep going, so he can go back to them anytime throughout the day. And he does, this is a child that will be drawing at his table or whipping up a new set of clay dinosaurs at 9pm before going to bed. I'm pretty "chillaxed" about how he flows through the day. Because we life school, he chooses what he does throughout the day. We don't force him to clean up anything, it just ebbs and flows with our family and whoever gets to it, gets to it.
I've had this nagging guilt around "self care" for a long time now. I've only recently realized it stemmed from the never-ending articles and blog posts (I've written about it too) floating around out there about how important self care is for ourselves. I have learned one thing. Guilt tripping myself about not getting enough self-care in, definitely does not feel good. I have been doing this for years! Years!
I just recently read this awesome post from Whole Family Rhythms about Letting Go of Self Care, and she put into words how I've felt all along. I don't need self-care to be another thing that I feel less than awesome about not accomplishing that day. I do the best that I have space for in my current life to take care of myself, and that's about it.
One of the greatest lessons for me, since my 2nd child was born, has been letting go of getting it all done. There is nothing worse than laying in bed trying to fall asleep and thinking about all of the things on your list that didn't get done (ok, yes there are things worse than this, but anyway). There will be another day, there will be another opportunity to seize the moment and power through more. There will be more delicious moments with your children, the laundry can wait. More importantly, don't waste your energy being bummed out or feeling guilty because you had too much on your plate that day. There is no point in wasting valuable energy and emotions on that.
Take a deep breath, remember all of the wonderful things you have in your life, and know it'll all get done eventually. Or it won't. And it's all good.